3 reasons to put the brakes on new relationships before divorce

On Behalf of | May 15, 2024 | Custody & Parental Access

You deserve to be happy, and if you are not happy in your current marriage then ending it through a divorce may be best. There are plenty of chances for romance out there, as they say.

But what happens if you find another love sooner, rather than later? What happens if you meet someone new while your divorce is ongoing? If you have children, then you need to take great care. You cannot afford to let a new relationship affect your relationship with your children.

Even if your kids can see that things have been rough between their parents, they may harbor unrealistic fantasies that you can somehow patch things up and all live as a happy family together. So the announcement of a divorce can hit them hard. For them to then find out you are already seeing someone new could hit them even harder.

1. Children are a chip off the old block

You may think your children look nothing like your spouse and have completely different interests and personalities to them. However, your children may not see it like that. They may see a part of each of you in themselves. So, if you reject their other parent and quickly replace them with a new flame, they may fear you could just as quickly go off them too. 

2. Your kids need you to spend time with them

Your divorce is probably the most difficult event of your children’s lives to date. So much is changing. They need you to be there for them, to comfort them, answer their questions or just sit on the couch in silence and stare at the TV with them. You can’t do that as much if you are busy dating someone new. If that person really is the right one for you, they should be prepared to be patient.

3. A new partner could harm your custody chances

The new person you’ve met seems ideal. They’re witty, kind, financially solvent and good-looking. The only problem is they have a bit of a complicated past. They were once arrested for assault (wrongly they claimed), spent two months in rehabilitation for alcohol use and have had their house raided by the police on numerous occasions on suspicion of dealing cocaine. They may be a lovely person today and have turned over a new leaf, but a divorce court might have concerns about your children spending time with them which could affect how they determine custody.

You can meet someone new when you least expect it, but if your divorce is still underway, it may be safer to put the brakes on it for the time being. Or at least seek experienced legal guidance to learn how to move forward while protecting your interests in the divorce.

At The Law Firm of Poppe & Associates, PLLC, our focus is relentless advocacy for our clients. If you or someone you know is considering divorce, reach out to schedule a consultation at 646-665-3903 or by contacting us online.